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Letting go is hard, but there are certain times that we need to end a relationship, including:

  • When one or both partners are experiencing abuse of any kind
  • Unhappiness with the relationship persists for a significant amount of time
  • There is unresolved conflict
  • You are staying in the relationship to avoid hurting your partner
  • It seems as though trust cannot be rebuilt
  • You are considering pursuing a relationship with someone else

Some individuals stay in a relationship because they are “afraid” to be alone, even when there are no feelings for the other person. Using a relationship as a security blanket to protect you from loneliness isn’t fair to the other person and doesn’t give you an opportunity to grow, learn about yourself, and find out what you need. If you’re in that type of situation, ending the relationship might be best for you and your partner.

How to End a Relationship

Ending a relationship is a hard thing to do. There could be feelings of guilt, fear of emotionally hurting your partner, fear that your partner may take it the wrong way, or wondering if you did everything possible to save the relationship. Although ending a relationship is easy for some, for others it can be a difficult thing. If you feel it is the best option for you, then you need to follow through no matter how difficult the process may be. In some instances, your partner may feel the same way, and in others, your partner doesn’t realize what’s going on. Holding on to a relationship that is over will only make the relationship worse and become more of a strain on you and your partner’s life. If ending a relationship is the best thing for you, then it would be the best thing for your partner.

Some Tips

  • Be honest – with yourself and your partner
  • Be respectful – end it clearly and compassionately
  • Be clear – don’t expect your partner to know what is going on; explain the situation and your feelings fully
  • Explain how you want the relationship to end (friendship, no contact, etc.).

Where to Get Help?

Relationships can be difficult, and sometimes a neutral, professional counselor can be a great source of support to help you decide if your relationships are healthy and right for you. There are a lot of resources available to help you on campus.

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